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Astroadvice – Saturn Conjunct the Ascendant: A Human Fortress

Trasitoen Espiral by Remedios Varo
“Tránsito en Espiral” (1962), by Remedios Varo.

“I’m experiencing a Saturn Return in my 1st house and I’m finding it hard to identify what areas of my life I should be focused on and what I truly do believe. I’m wondering where I should start on my journey toward a conscious personal transformation and I have also recently been excommunicated from of my best friends due to my own neglect and habitual responses for fear and lack of exposure to true intimacy. I’m feeling isolated and I know that’s normal during this transit, but I’m not sure the best way for me to deal. Your insight is welcome as I also have my Saturn intercepted and am wondering if this is the time where I should be focusing on unlocking that Saturn/Sagittarian energy and how I might go about doing so.”
Kori W.

Dear Kori,
in order to understand the implications of your Saturn Return, we should keep in mind that both Saturn and the first House rule very basic, primal elements of human experience. Saturn represents structure, framework or foundation, while the first house rules selfhood and the body. For one, this means that it’s necessary to narrow (Saturn) your focus, and begin… with yourself. With your physical body. Your role. Your identity. Your personality. Your very own storyline. A perspective that it’s entirely yours – not of someone else, of an earlier version of you, of your “emotional pain body“. Saturn forms a close conjunction to your Ascendant, and challenging 1st House placements or aspects to the Ascendant often manifest as traumatic or uncomfortable imprints stored in the bodily memory, which put the chart holder in a permanent state of alert, creating difficulties with relatedness. You’ve said it yourself: fear, lack of exposure to true intimacy have previously sabotaged one of your most important relationships in life. With Saturn conjunct your Ascendant from your first house side, you have turned yourself into a human fortress, building your walls brick after brick, quite possibly guided by some form of conditioning that shaped your perspective (Sagittarius). And even though there’s nothing wrong with boundaries (Saturn), you got to a point where you made yours insurmountable; anything, if taken to the extreme, can become detrimental, and the first Saturn return is typically the window when such self-defeating patterns can be investigated and cleared out. If you put all of these pieces together, the big picture (a Sagittarian specialty) provides the answer: you start on your journey towards conscious personal transformation by releasing the crystallized tension and stored feelings held in your physical memory (think bodywork, massage, holistic therapies), reviewing your own perspective and beliefs about yourself, and ultimately write a new storyline from scratch. Do you view your body as a prison? A burden? What conditioned you to build walls around you? Do you want to stay stuck with a perspective that hinders your progress? Is your fear more important than your need to form authentic, open bonds based on trust? Do you want to let the lack of exposure to true intimacy experienced in the past, dictate your future? Does your perspective (Sagittarius) about yourself and your personal past hold a selective focus on the bad, the negative, the limiting (Saturn)?
I’m aware that all of this might elicit a reluctant, fearful response at first, but Saturn in Sagittarius is also about confronting fear (Saturn) through experience (Sagittarius). There is no other way to become more relaxed and comfortable in your own skin; venturing out of your fortress, looking at yourself from different angles, looking your fear in the eye. It’s not easy to “de-program” yourself and acquire a new perspective, but leaving things as they are will definitely make things much harder in the long run.
It’s time for you to take control and write a new script: one where you believe you have the right to be gentle on yourself and deserve intimacy, encouragement, closeness and appreciation just like the rest of us.

Comments (10)

  • Thank you! That was more than insightful. I certainly don’t view my body as burden or prison but my personality and expression have certainly taken on that role in my life. In the last year I’ve taken up shadow work, but feel the need for a connection that allows me to explore those issues on a deeper level.

    “I’m aware that all of this might elicit a reluctant, fearful response at first, but Saturn in Sagittarius is also about confronting fear (Saturn) through experience (Sagittarius). There is no other way to become more relaxed and comfortable in your own skin; venturing out of your fortress, looking at yourself from different angles, looking your fear in the eye.”

    I am constantly battling the idea that I don’t deserve love because of who I am or am not, and that is the root of all my self sabotaging behaviors in relationships. There is a lingering feeling that I have to save my loved ones from my true self. I really appreciate your being able to put that in to words and offer some starting points for me.

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    • I was so taken with your response. I too, have Saturn transiting Sagittarius. It is in my first house. My fears are so similar to what you express. I shut people out for the very reasons you expressed. I am working to leave that way of thinking behind. I am struggling to realize where my fear/self esteem originated. Thank you for your honesty. . . It gave me strength to keep looking inward as to what makes me fearful of real closeness.
      I need that intimacy but I haven’t broken through yet. Knowing I am not alone has really helped so much.
      ‘Onward and Through!

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    • KW,
      My natal Saturn in my 12th house is conjunct to my Sagittarius ascendant .
      I have been struggling with those same exact issues as well & recently decided to get back into astolgy, but much more intensely this time. It never seems to disappoint when trying resolve internal issues!
      I’m just afraid that I may have waited too long as there are only a few months left to my saturn return.
      You stated that you have been doing shadow work, I have started looking into it as well along with karmic astrology in hopes of finding a connection to explore myself and my issues on a deeper level. I feel like I need to get to the dive deep into all of my shadows & face them in order to be able to overcome & grow from this.
      Would you mind sharing any materials that you feel were helpful to you? Or even some of your experiences? I would truly appreciate if you could!!!
      Not sure if you can relate, but I’m also a recovering addict & in kind of at a stand still in my recovery.

      – L
      I know this comment is old; hope you are still able to get this!

      Rispondi
      • I’ve been paying particular attention to trying to embody the positive traits of sagittarius both externally and internally. I figure a part of being true to myself is looking at my first house and the potential therein and trying to sort of build up an external expression based on what i feel inside that seems to have been missed by others. Speaking my truth unapologetically (Sag) but also looking at placements that make aspects to this house and how they can be better expressed.

        I am currently reading “Interceptions: Your Hidden Powers” by Joann Wickenburg and loving it.

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        • *correction “Your Hiddent Powers: Interceptions & Retrograde Planets”

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  • Wow great read. As of today I have Saturn sitting on my ascendant and Mars is joining in in a few days. All this swearing Neptune. I have been so hard on myself and so isolated and ashamed of my body. I am just waiting for it to pass but it is hard.

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  • My ascendant is 9 degrees Sagittarius. My natal Saturn is 2 degrees Sagittarius. The roads been Rocky

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  • […] With Saturn conjunct your Ascendant from your first house side, you have turned yourself into a human fortress, building your walls brick after brick, quite possibly guided by some form of conditioning that shaped your perspective (Sagittarius). And even though there’s nothing wrong with boundaries (Saturn), you got to a point where you made yours insurmountable; anything, if taken to the extreme, can become detrimental, and the first Saturn return is typically the window when such self-defeating patterns can be investigated and cleared out. If you put all of these pieces together, the big picture (a Sagittarian specialty) provides the answer: you start on your journey towards conscious personal transformation by releasing the crystallized tension and stored feelings held in your physical memory (think bodywork, massage, holistic therapies), reviewing your own perspective and beliefs about yourself, and ultimately write a new storyline from scratch. Do you view your body as a prison? A burden? What conditioned you to build walls around you? Do you want to stay stuck with a perspective that hinders your progress? Is your fear more important than your need to form authentic, open bonds based on trust? Do you want to let the lack of exposure to true intimacy experienced in the past, dictate your future? Read more @ Aeternalight-astrology.com […]

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